Books I Read in January

dystopian science fiction + autofiction + literary fiction + romance

“Books are life objects and not optional.”—Elisa Gabbert

Welcome to Books I Read in January, a monthly series inspired by Martha’s Monthly, as seen on’s recaps, and this essay she wrote on reading versus living. I’m not me if I’m not reading, but I’m not living if I’m only reading.

I find I do (something) more purposefully once I’ve written it out or down, so I’m using this series as a space to talk about my reading habits, cataloging what I’ve read and what it meant, month after month, while challenging myself to read outside the genres and the topics I generally reach for.

So, January felt like the longest month. ever. I’m often drawn towards easy-to-read thrillers I can read on my phone in the cold, dark days. So, almost half the books I read were on my phone and part of a dystopian science fiction series. Then, despite the month seeming to go on and on, I did have three books I simply did not get to read/finish before their due date.

All in all, I read 8 total. I rented 7 books from the library, 3 of which were read on Libby. 1 book is mine.

Scaffolding by Lauren Elkin

“We only know what we know to know. We can only recognise what we’ve already seen. I worry that’s one of my limitations, as a therapist. That I can only respond to what a patient is saying on the basis of my narrow understanding of the world.”

A novel about marriage, womanhood, desire, the psyche set in Paris. It follows two stories, fifty years apart: In 1972, a young couple living in a bohemian apartment realize they hardly know each another. In 2019, another couple inhabit the same space, facing distance, a miscarriage, and the past creeping in. Even the title is sentimental with this novel: In the contemporary plot, the building is scaffolded to repair its facade, and the emotional journey of the main character echoes it. Both timelines share a sentiment: women are made to anticipate freedoms they’re not allowed to fully explore.

You’d like this if you’re looking for:

A quiet but quite loud exploration of the psyche, the fulfillment of a liaison without the plane ticket to Paris, and a dramatized evolution of feminism over the past fifty years.

You might also like:

All Fours by Miranda July, The Copenhagen Trilogy by Tove Ditlevsen, Twenty-Four Hours in the Life of a Woman by Stefan Zweig, Breasts and Eggs by Mieko Karakami

Rental House by Weike Wang

“Home is not a given and, for many, a hard, sometimes impossible place to find.”

A quiet, introspective story about the marriage of a Chinese American couple living in NYC, examined through the lens of two different vacations. The first part takes place during the pandemic at a rental beach house, where the couple hosts their parents at different times. The second part shifts to an upstate New York rental, years later, where a melancholy pervades. Their relationship feels different or maybe just the same but the lack of growth feels stagnant. It’s evident in their interactions and feelings—a tiredness. And it got me thinking about when we place ourselves in a house that is not our home. Wang captures the liminality of transient living, where intimacy and routine falter in unfamiliar spaces, and the struggle to find joy becomes more apparent. More felt. It’s the unfamiliar setting that reveals how much the person you’re with defines the difference.

You’d like this if you’re looking for:

A quiet introspective novel that’s more about thought than plot.

You might also like:

The Idiot by Elif Batuman, Eileen by Ottessa Moshfegh, Big Swiss by Jen Begin

Red Rising by Pierce Brown

“I look at him for a moment. Words are a weapon stronger than he knows. And songs are even greater. The words wake the mind. The melody wakes the heart. I come from a people of song and dance. I don’t need him to tell me the power of words. But I smile nonetheless.”

This gripping dystopian science fiction series follows Darrow, a member of the lowest caste in a color-coded society. As a Red, he toils beneath the surface of Mars, believing his work will make the planet habitable for future generations. However, he soon discovers humanity already thrives on Mars, and his people have been enslaved under a cruel lie. Sacrificing his life, body, and identity, Darrow becomes part of a fight far greater than himself.

You’d like this if you’re looking for:

The newest fantasy series that isn’t ACOTR or Red Wing, with good writing.

You might also like:

The Kingkiller Chronicle by Patrick Rothfuss

How to End a Love Story by Yulin Kuang

“You don't have to be completely healed to be everything I want. To be mine. I want every part of you, you silly infuriating woman. I love the parts of you I haven't even met yet.”

There won’t ever be a time where I’ll not read a love story, especially an enemies-to-lover trope. Helen Zhang hasn’t seen Grant Shepard since her sister’s funeral in high school, but here he is a writer on the set of her book-to-tv series adaption. It’s a story about learning how to let go of understandings of ourselves, that ultimate perfect isn’t a requirement to be in a relationship just an openness to the person’s many selves to come and support for every version your partner will ever be. Fun fact: Yulin Kuang is the screenwriter for two upcoming Emily Henry adaptations!

You’d like this if you’re looking for:

Hot romance.

You might also like:

[Insert Every Book Title] by Emily Henry, Funny You Should Ask by Elissa Sussman

Any Person Is the Only Self by Elisa Gabbert

“This is why it’s worth reading the classics—to spend enough time with a text that a reference to it isn’t just outside you, but connected to your intimate experience of the text and all other texts it connects to.”

A series of curious, revealing essays, each one opened the floor to contemplations of how we define and understand the concept of ‘self, ’ introduced through Gabbert’s relationship to certain pieces of literature, poems, culture, or simply her life. One that stood out to me what her exploration of self after the pandemic lockdown began. Before, train rides were one of her favorites times to think and observe others. She is a self-proclaimed starer (I also love staring at people). It’s this ability to assign stories to strangers that can be compelling when I think about myself in the inverse. Anyways, when that interaction disappeared, she felt an unanticipated withdrawal from these daily interactions. Another idea that stuck with me is her metaphor of people as either an ‘squid’ or ‘eel.’ Squids are born fully formed and only grow larger, while eels transform through different stages of life. It’s a fascinating framework for thinking about he self as a steady reckoning or a constant evolution. I haven’t quite figured out which I am. Maybe I’m an eel with tentacles.

If I had to choose five pieces of literature, top of mind, that have added to my portrait of self, they would have to be: Jacob’s Room by Virginia Woolf, Angels in America by Tony Kushner, Our Aesthetic Categories: Zany, Cute, Interesting by Sianne Ngai, Middlemarch by George Eliot, and Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer. There’s quite a bit of art I’d have to include, too.

You’d like this if you’re looking for:

Conversational yet theoretical exploration of sense of self.

You might also like:

The Argonauts or Bluets by Maggie Nelson, My Life in Middlemarch by Rebecca Mead

The Italy Letters by Vi Khi Nao

“Most of all, I don’t expect my love for you to go anywhere, just to give me the optical illusion that there was time or the illusion of time or the illusion of knowing myself and knowing you through desiring you.”

Looking for a different type of literature than the above while I was away, I started this novella which took me by surprise even though it’s just as it advertises. In the form of a love letter, fragmented, a stream of consciousness. The unnamed narrator struggles to care for her dying mother with crippling debt in Las Vegas while longing for her lover in Italy. It’s sad and sensual, tender and poetic in its sentiment about the relationship that is shared through letters and phone calls, across distance and time and understandings.

My Year of Rest & Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh, An American Marriage by Tayari Jones, The Safekeep by Yael van der Wouden, The Coin by Yasmin Zaher

Golden Son by Pierce Brown

“If you're a fox, play the hare. If you're the hare, play the fox.”

The second book of the Red Rising series has no shortage of fighting or betrayal. Guided by the memory of his wife, Eo, who died a martyr for the rebellion, Darrow’s double life as a Gold remains haunted by his Red roots. He fights to dismantle the color-coded society from within, where trust is scarce and victory comes at a cost.

Morning Star by Pierce Brown

“You and I keep looking for light in the darkness, expecting it to appear. But it already has.” I touch his shoulder. “We’re it, boyo. Broken and cracked and stupid as we are, we’re the light, and we’re spreading.”

In the third installment of the Red Rising series, Darrow and his comrades must inspire those to join their forces to break the chains once and for all, while working to build a better world afterwards. The focus on Darrow’s friends and family and enemies in this book was a reminder to hold your friends close and to never let them forget how loved they are, that if all went wrong in the world, they’d still have you. What I enjoy about this series is the variation of plot line from book to book. Often, there’s a cyclical nature to fantasy that after a while the predictability is boring, but not here. The betrayals and the reuniting and the wars and times of peace are always (well, mostly) surprising.

What’s on deck for February?

• The Argonauts by Maggie Nelson

• The Other Profile by Irene Graziosi

• Shred Sisters by Betsy Lerner

• Tell Me Everything by Elizabeth Strout

• The Husbands by Holly Gramazio

• Iron Gold by Pierce Brown

• Rejection by Tony Tulathimutte

• Margo’s Got Money Troubles by Rufi Thorpe

• What’s It Like In Words by Eliza Moss

• Mina’s Matchbox by Yōk Ogawa

• The Empusium by Olga Tokarczuk

What did you read last month? Leave it in the comments.

xoxo,

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